Faith, Religion and Me

When I was young, I looked forward to "Simbang Gabi", wherein you have to attend mass as early as 4am in the morning for 9 days.  Not that I knew what it was for, but I enjoyed exploring a different side of our neighborhood before dawn.  Dark and very quiet.  However after the mass, it was quite lively and bright with all the night markets serving native delicacies.

So years went by and the fascination wore off...
and grew up half hating attending the Catholic mass.
it was lifeless
it was meaningless
I didn't understand the purpose of standing, kneeling, chanting a thousand prayers, beating yourself to death, and crowded processions.
Some of the people dutifully practicing the so called rituals don't even have the holiest of attitudes.

However, there is still a part of me that wants to fully explore the realness of a God.

So have I really found God yet?
Honestly, I want to confidently say so.
But lately I am a little bothered.

There's still a part of me that questions the origin of the bible.
Is it really real?
Is it really from God?
How did these authors come up with such stories?
Why do people consider it as a book from God?
Why are there other religions?

Just try doing a google search "Is the Bible Real" and you'll be shaken about the results.

Although its word is quite insightful and has a life changing effect.  I still can't help but think if it's just a variation of "think positive" methods but relying on an imaginary third person.